Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize