we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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