hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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