haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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