just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
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I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
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You. Win. At. Life.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
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