I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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