i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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