talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
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