check it out our google latitudes are spooning
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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