you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
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