he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
