we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
