As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
