She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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