Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
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