i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
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The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
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You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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