She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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