Heybabeimwearingurpanties
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Randomize
