And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I have already put on my inside pants.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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