I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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