I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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