At least make sure they are 18
Why
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize