I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
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you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
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Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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