I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Randomize
