i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
