I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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