I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
we're so committed to being not committed
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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