Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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