You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
