Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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