I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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