i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
dude. I can hear the air.
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