Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
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Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
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you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice