do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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