Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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