Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Randomize
