Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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