Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize