he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
40s are totally the cure
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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