For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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