I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He came over last night and as soon as we started having sex Siri announced "you've arrived at your destination." I think it was some kinda sign
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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