Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
