we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
These 25 People Are Obsessed With Pizza
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
16 Sexual Experiences EVERYONE Should Have At Least Once
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast