I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
