when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
Randomize
