considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
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