I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
