I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
