He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Randomize
