I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Randomize
